If you really want things in your life to change, you have to go to the root.
When the foundation is crooked you can’t rearrange the furniture and expect to feel balanced for too long.
Oooh, but honey, you will try. So hard. In fact, you’ll put so much time, money, energy into external shifts (or even the more subtle versions of pushing away bad thoughts for more posi versions) that your old programming* will convince you that you’re doing the deep work.
The old programming will do its darndest to keep you from changing because of fear. Fear of change, growth, the unknown, the unsafe, the uncertain.
If you catch yourself pointing externally saying, “Things aren’t working because of that over there” or “I tried but I just can’t because xyz”, then you are missing the vital lesson.**
You aren’t going to the root and taking responsibility for the stories you perpetuate about yourself that keep you small.
You did, after all, create the original programming (not the trauma — be clear). So you can create whatever you want.***
Here are a few clarifying questions to ask yourself when trying to get to the root of ickystickystuck patterns…take out your journal…
- What is the old pattern you’re experiencing now and are ready to release? Really zero in how you feel and what your thinking/feeling/behavior patterns are. This isn’t about what other people are doing to you, it’s about your feelings.
- Sitting in this pattern, what is it that you are believing about yourself? About the world around you? Feel unheard/unseen? Unloved? Unloveable? Not good enough? All alone? If you’re authentically you, you’ll be rejected? What is it? Be honest and gentle. This is a core limiting belief you have about yourself.
- Go back to early childhood (even if it’s foggy) and see if you can connect with the first time you ever felt this feeling. The first time you remember having the thought above. All beliefs start out as thoughts.
- See yourself as that child, (this is where you time travel). The one who had that first thought and internalized other people’s undone BS because, by goddess, they were gonna survive. They were doing the best they knew how.
- Imagine you’re in a place from your childhood where you felt safe and good. See your young one there. Shine some love, light, and FORGIVENESS on them. Forgive them and you for holding onto this limiting belief for so long. Hear them, see them, listen to them. Let them know it’s gonna be ok. Be who you needed when you were young.
- When the communication is over (you’ll know), let them know you’ll be back and are connected to them. Shine love, light and forgiveness on them again. See a door closing in your mind.
- Come back. Breathe deeply. Take notes about what you felt and saw.
That is the work, my beauty. Starting with awareness — uncovering the old, limiting beliefs — and releasing/dissolving/letting that go so you can make space to create new beliefs.
That is how you manifest. Not by crossing fingers and hoping that you get what you want. Manifestation isn’t about getting.
It’s about clearing the channel so you can connect with the truth of who you really are and the abundance that is all around you and in you at every moment. Let your inner child guide you. Get slow enough to hear them.
So how to clear the channel to connect with all that truth of who you really are?
You have to slow down to speed up. More specifically, you have to slow down to get clear on where you want to go and how you want to feel when you DO speed up.
Follow my guidance in the bullets above and then go to my “Slow The Eff Down” guided meditation, visualization, training & guide to make room for more of what you really want.
>> In a few weeks I’ve got something exciting to share with you. Perfect summer soul food. Stay tuned and make some room (in your spirit) with the meditation practice above!
*And transferred to you through your DNA. Studies have shown that the genetic imprints of traumatic experiences can be passed from one generation to another epigenetically. Basically, we get our parents’ undealt with trauma no matter what.
**This is not in denial of systemic forms of oppression that have intentionally discriminated against BIPOC. We cannot move forward until we truly recognize how our society is really built, dismantle it within ourselves and in our collective consciousness, and move forward with justice and accountability.
***Or you accepted what was handed to you. You took the pact that was passed down, likely through generations. Which is what all of us do. You’re not alone. But you can break the pact and create your own life.
Photo by sfgirlbybay.com