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Why Taking Big Action Isn’t Always The Answer (I Know!)

Why taking big action isn’t always the answer (I know!)

Don’t you just love the feeling of getting shit done? Mmmm, that luscious feeling of accomplishment when you cross another thing off your to-do list, or complete a project…doesn’t it just make you want to DO MORE and more and more?

So here’s the thing though (you knew it was comin’) — you can’t fix/cure/heal everything by DO-ing.

I’d like to redefine doing. Taking action isn’t always about big moves. They can be small, internal, subtle moves.

Your doing comes from your being. You can’t change the external to change the internal. You can’t do things out in the world hoping it will change the way you feel inside. It’s the other way around.*

Change your beliefs and your world will change. As the ever-wise Dr. Wayne Dyer once said,

“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

In fact, those inner moves are what will best support the big moves. Let me ‘splain my brain on this one.

Say you have something in your life not working the way you’d like it to:

  • funky romance juju — keep attracting emotionally/psychically unavailable people
  • your favorite jeans are too tight to sit down in without seriously worrying about internal organ damage
  • you can’t seem to move the things you want to…the distraction struggle is real

What do you do? You…update your dating profile for the 391st time and commit to short coffee dates ONLY. Force yourself to go to the gym and march on that stairmaster ’til you die and adopt the single cube of cheese diet. Buy an online course for time management, one for curing distraction and another for setting up your entire business in under 72 hours.

And maybe those things work. For a little while. Then you’re back in the same old pattern. Why? Because you can’t DO your way out of an old pattern. Not for the long haul.

Old patterns (aka your mindset) have been with you since you were a child, growing and evolving with you over your life. There are beliefs at the core of these patterns that cannot (and will not, those feisty binches) be pushed down.

Those beliefs were once born out of a desire to protect you from pain. They no longer serve you now, and so you’re bumping up against the boundary of your known world.**

Action is needed, yes. But it is guaranteed to be more subtle than you think.

  • Instead of changing your profile, you may need to come to terms with the kind of people you’ve been attracting because respectful, nurturing, intimacy wasn’t a thing you saw a lot of growing up. You’re not alone.
  • Instead of setting yourself up for another shame spiral because after 2 gym weeks your jeans are still too tight and you’re hangry, you may need to slow the eff down and listen to what your body really wants to tell you. It may be whispering something about more self love. Can you hear it?
  • Instead of buying more online courses you don’t ever finish and re-organizing your desk (again), you may need to look at what is so scary about actually doing what you want to do. Is it fear of failure? Fear of success? Fear of how much you think you’ll have to sacrifice to really have what you want because success and sacrifice is what you learned growing up?

Action can be internal. Setting the intention to love yourself and be connected to your gifts? THAT is active. Especially if you beat yourself up several times a day. You’ll be your own summer blockbuster with all that inner action.


* You can book your free 30 minute discovery session. Yeah, it’s an action, but we’ll GO IN on the being (with some doing). I’m a Libra, we love balance.

** Scarier than it sounds…this is your chance for liberation my love! To be the most you you’ve ever been. To leap into the mystery and create your life. Yeah. Whoa.

Image by Mystic Mamma